Confidence is like a muscle. You have to work at it. Easier said than done, we all have our slip-ups. However, if you want to start being confident, you’re going to need to start acting like it and soon. The sooner the better! Being secure in yourself, trusting in your own abilities, trusting in God for when things are out of your control, and believing that you were made with purpose – and that that purpose is a good one! Confidence isn’t something that you are just born with. You DO have to work on it. Confidence is in your language, your texts, your social media, your relationships with others, your relationship with yourself. It is you, 24/7 no strings attached, and guess what? Other people have gone from 0-100 in the confidence sector before and so can you. Now, being confidence is one thing – being prideful and arrogant is another. Confidence blended with humility is the perfect marriage for developing that je nais se qoi that keeps others attracted to you and listening to what you have to say. Why? Confidence shows the world that you – in your imperfectness – matter. It shows that not only do you matter, but you have something to say about it! Here are my top 5 tips for practicing being confident day in and day out – follow these tips for 40 days and watch as it becomes second nature. Shall we?
Eliminate negative language entirely. – When I say entirely, I mean ENTIRELY. What does it mean to eliminate negative language? First and foremost, anything bad you volunteer about yourself to others. Such as “Oh, I’m no good at” “I Could never” “I’m the worst at” and wishes / wants “I wish I could wear that” “I want that so bad, but I can’t” etc. You aren’t going to catch yourself right away but tell yourself now (aloud) “I am going to stop saying negative things about myself” and your brain will place a marker on that thought. The next time you start to say something bad, a little red flag will go off and when it does, pivot your comment or stop it entirely. You need to be confident about yourself first. Nip the negativity in the butt!
Practice your posture and eye contact – This is one of my biggest tips when it comes to confidence. Posture means holding yourself tall. Physically taking up space and not being apologetic about it. Not shrinking when it comes to being around people that intimidate you, even if you feel like curling into a ball! The more you practice standing tall and looking people in the eyes, the more you’ll come to realize that a) its not that scary / hard b) people are more attuned to what you are saying. Stand up straight and look ’em in the eyes! You got this.
Show doubt the door and anything attached to it! – Anytime you hear the subtle whispers of doubt pop into your mind (Who are you to say / do this? What makes you think you’re so special? You know you could never do x, y, z) Slam the door on your thoughts and leave them be! Self-doubt can be debilitating and leave you miserable. It comes in the form of a habit, too, which makes it hard to break free from but once you start training yourself to ignore those doubts, you’ll find confidence coming more naturally.
When it comes to other people’s comments, be wary of the type of advice coming your way. Is it coming from a place of love? Or is it coming from a place of jealousy? If its love, entertain the commentary. If its coming from a place of jealousy – see them to the nearest exit. This goes for your significant other, your family, loved ones, friends (especially friends unfortunately), co-workers etc. Jealousy is a horrible thing. It has been the cause of much heartbreak and suffering but if I had ever listened to the jealous comments of people in my life, I wouldn’t be where I am today. Always see the motives behind other’s comments. Remember, your opinion is just as valid as theirs so feel free to challenge what they say. “Of course I can work full-time for myself. It might be risky, but I know I can do it!” (see this article)
Make the decision to be confident right now. Not tomorrow, not the next day, right now. Building confidence is a muscle! You’ve got to work at it day in and day out! Make the decision today to challenge your negative beliefs about yourself. Make the decision and choose to think positively about your abilities even if you feel like you are lying to yourself! I give myself mental pep-talks daily. Pep-talking yourself and listening to your strong words helps you take action when it comes to building confidence (ex. You’ve got this Rachel. You can make this blog successful, today. You CAN build this business. You WILL prove them wrong. You ARE meant to do this blog! <—- actual pep-talks from the brain of yours truly!)
*Bonus tip: Be compassionate towards yourself. People make mistakes left and right! Building confidence means giving yourself the same permission to not be perfect. You are working at it, and that is all that matters!
Sign Up For Exclusive Events, Shopping Updates and Behind the Scenes!.